Have you ever noticed something when you were all alone and it both shocked and horrified you? I have. Let me tell you a story…

"NO!!!" I felt a flash of heat as I screamed in silent horror. 

Rushing upstairs to look in the bathroom mirror my worst fear was realized. I saw the beginning of a stress sore on the corner of my mouth. Without conscious awareness my inner alarm triggered panic to flood throughout my nervous system. With ghastly images becoming more hideous by the second, I frantically searched through the cupboards, looking for my prescription to head off this atrocity.  

As the panic attack triggered an asthma attack, and my breathing became very shallow, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Wide frightened eyes, raised eye-brows, and frozen facial features. Slowing down, I held my own gaze, and watched as it slowly transformed into one of recognition and then the warmth of gentle kindness. 

Silently, I acknowledged what it was like to...

I’ve spent time with several people lately that have been really struggling with deep sadness and grief. This sadness can feel so profound that the heart contracts and it feels very similar to a heart attack. Your heart can feel heavy with grief.

Have you ever felt your heart contract with pain, to where it feels difficult to breathe as well? Panic attacks are actually an activation of the PANIC/GRIEF/ABANDONMENT circuitry. When these attacks happen, it seems as if the very ground beneath your feet falls away. You can feel lost. Your SEEKING circuit dissipates, and you have no way to even begin to make movement in your world.

As we begin to allow ourselves to be held by others, and not be alone in our grief, we can have the courage to name our experience. We can receive some acknowledgement around what it’s like to be us in those moments. Such as, “Would it be sweet if someone understood just how difficult this is?”

Notice what happens in your body as you...