Journey to Self-Awareness: Breaking Free from Autopilot

I've been reflecting on those moments in my day when I slip into autopilot, becoming an unwitting passenger in my own life. It's left me wondering: how did I let myself become a spectator in my own story? How can I reclaim my presence, slow down, and truly regain control of my choices?

This phenomenon can be incredibly subtle. For instance, when I'm out feeding my horses, a wave of reminiscence can wash over me, and suddenly, I find myself lost in the "ever-present-past." In those moments, I'm no longer fully engaged; I'm merely going through the motions.

Just yesterday, as I chatted with my aunt on my headset while driving to visit my grandkids, I realized I had missed my turn-off entirely! It's become evident how frequently I slip into autopilot throughout the day. I've come to appreciate the beauty of being fully present and empowered, the ability to slow down my inner processes and truly observe my life and the choices it presents. To consciously direct where I channel my energy.

This realization has brought forth another puzzle – when I'm unconscious, I'm unaware of where my energy is flowing. It simply follows its well-worn path, and I continue doing what I've always done. It's no wonder I struggle to make progress in areas I want to improve until I pause and become aware of these patterns.

Slowing down and recognizing these patterns are essential steps. However, it can feel vulnerable, for there's often an inner voice suggesting that I should know things before I've even learned them – a fallacy.

Yet, when we pay attention to what ignites our passion, what genuinely brings us joy, and what we value most, we can invest time aligning our souls with these values. In doing so, we free ourselves to be honest and to own our experiences in the world.

One significant key to my personal growth has been embracing transparency. Rather than judging myself for my unconscious moments, I've learned to laugh at them. I observe the patterns and gently unpack them to establish new, more compassionate patterns. These new patterns grant me the freedom to choose consciously.

Becoming aware of the infinite choices available in each moment can indeed be intimidating, but it's a journey well worth embarking on.