Recently, I had the opportunity to attend a conference, which has always been a source of inspiration and community for me. The energy there is so warm and welcoming, and it feels like a big family reunion every time. The people are diverse, fun, and deeply connected, making each experience truly enriching.
One memorable moment from the conference was sparked by a speaker who mentioned the concept of “sandpaper” in relationships. It was a lighthearted metaphor, yet so true. We all chuckled, recognizing how certain interactions can feel abrasive, depending on the situation. This idea of ‘sandpaper’ stuck with me, especially as I encountered a situation that challenged my usual patterns of behavior.
During the conference, I found myself in a scenario that triggered an old survival pattern—a pattern where I avoid conflict at all costs. It happened when I was saving seats for my team in the front row, only to have someone else claim the seat I had reserved....
Hi there, I wanted to take a moment to connect with you from a special place—my sanctuary. This morning, I decided to step outside, find my swing, and simply be in nature. From where I sit, I can see my chickens roaming freely, a flock of quail darting through the brush, and the vast expanse of the pasture stretching out before me. It's one of those peaceful fall mornings where the gentle breeze and fresh air feel like a gift.
As the seasons shift from summer to fall, I’ve noticed a bit of a transition within myself. I’ve always loved the warmth and energy of summer, and there’s a part of me that wasn’t quite ready to let it go. Have you ever felt that way? Those moments when something in your life is so lovely, so full of light, that you wish it could last just a little longer? But, as we all know, change is inevitable. It’s woven into the fabric of life, constantly guiding us from one season to the next.
Lately, I’ve been growing my...
When we’re on a journey toward healing and wholeness, it can be easy to fall into a common trap—focusing on what we “don’t” want. We make declarations like, “I’m not going to do that anymore,” or “I need to let go of this bad habit.” While the intention is good, what many don’t realize is that this kind of focus can actually reinforce the very behavior we’re trying to change.
Why? Because when we focus on what we don’t want, we’re still giving energy and attention to it, unconsciously reinforcing that habit. The mind latches onto the habit itself, rather than the positive change we’re aiming for. So, how do we shift that pattern? The key lies in learning to pay attention to the words we say and how they make us feel. Rather than focusing on what you want to avoid, start framing it in a positive light by focusing on what you “do” want to bring into your life.
Let me share a personal...
Have you ever had a dream where you were flying? That feeling of soaring through the sky, free and unburdened? I hadn’t had a dream like that in years, but just the other night, it happened again. It reminded me of a magical experience from my childhood—a time when I felt truly free. As I sat with the dream and let its meaning sink in, I realized just how much it mirrors what's happening in my life right now.
When I was a child, flying dreams were the most magical experiences I could imagine. They were filled with freedom and joy, just like riding a horse bareback with my arms outstretched, feeling the wind on my face and in my hair. That sense of weightlessness, of being able to escape gravity and soar, was an unforgettable feeling. It's one of the reasons I’ve always loved riding bareback—the sensation is so similar to those dreams, and it represents the same kind of freedom that calls to my heart.
But this recent dream wasn’t just about flying. It...
Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night, the wee hours of the morning and your mind just won't turn off? That happened for me last night, and every single thing that I've ever done in my entire existence was on replay, all the things that I didn't like, all the things that I was ashamed of, all of the things that I judged myself for and found myself lacking. They were all in full living Technicolor, and I found myself cringing.
When I recognized that, I took the time to slow down, to be in my heart and to welcome my experience as best I could. I acknowledged the truth, I acknowledged what it's been like to be me. I acknowledged all those different times by time traveling to them, and acknowledging that I was doing the best that I could with what I had. I acknowledged where I just kind of gave up, or maybe I settled for less, and I saw clearly that before I didn't even recognize what I was doing in the moment. I hadn’t recognized that I wasn't keeping my eyes on what...
As I continue on my path of self-discovery and healing, I often reflect on the earlier stages of my journey—back when I first started noticing my patterns. At the time, I was consumed with shame every time I recognized one of these patterns in myself. My initial reaction was, "This is bad. I shouldn’t be doing that." But over time, and with compassionate understanding, I’ve learned not to step into the field of judgment so quickly.
One of the most powerful things I did during those early stages, which helped me begin to dissolve the patterns or, at the very least, diminish their control over my behavior, was simply acknowledging them. When I noticed I was running a pattern, I no longer made myself wrong for it. Instead, I chose to witness it.
I would take a step back—into my heart—and observe my behavior with curiosity, rather than judgment. I started to ask myself, "What is this pattern really about? What are the nuances of my experience that allow...
The other day, I was having a conversation with someone I’ve spoken with many times before. As we talked, I noticed a pattern unfolding in their life—one that had become so clear to me, but they seemed completely unaware of it. They couldn’t see that they were running a routine that shaped how their life played out. What struck me most was how this person was constantly busy, filled with tasks that, on the surface, seemed good and productive. But it made me wonder—had they ever truly slowed down to ask themselves if these "good" things were aligned with what they actually love?
It’s a question I think many of us could ask ourselves: Are the things keeping us busy things we truly love, or are they just habits we’ve fallen into over time?
In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to get caught up in the rush, checking off tasks, handling responsibilities, and moving from one thing to the next without pause. But what if those busy routines...
Today, I want to talk about how life can sometimes feel like a rollercoaster. One moment, you're soaring high, feeling as if everything is going your way, and the next, something unexpected happens that shocks you to your core. It can feel devastating, unsettling your entire system.
When these experiences happen, they often bring up unresolved stuff from our past. Our nervous system, specifically the amygdala, is constantly scanning and recording everything that happens in our lives. When we're faced with shock or trauma, it triggers old patterns we thought we had dealt with, and they can come rushing back with surprising intensity. Even if they’re familiar, these nuances can feel overwhelming.
In those moments, it’s important to stay connected—not just with yourself, but with someone you trust. Name what’s happening. Name the shock. Allow yourself to be seen and supported. When everything feels heavy and discouraging, and all you want to do is hide away,...
I invite you to step into the past with me to learn about a client’s transformative journey using the Mind Body Method in a session with a horse.
With eyes closed and arms outstretched, my client delved deep into her inner world, accompanied by my faithful horse.
Unraveling the layers of fear and inhibition, she confronted childhood conditioning that stifled her emotions and hindered her expression. Memories of her father's stern admonishments to "stop crying" flooded back, leaving her feeling unseen and unheard in her experience of life.
With tears and vulnerability, she acknowledged the pain of hiding her true self, even from herself. The weight of expectations and the need to be strong for others weighed heavily on her shoulders, leaving her feeling disconnected and alone.
With gentle guidance, she learned to trust her body's wisdom and embrace her authenticity. Through a series of exercises, she tapped into the sensations in her body, naming her fears and emotions as they...
This week, I've spent time connecting with with people who are navigating a delicate and vulnerable space in their lives. They've shared experiences of losing their focus and grappling with a foggy mind, all while feeling the pain very deeply. Often they adopt a strategy of just keeping busy, busy to distract their minds from the discomfort. As intense focus tends to silence the default mode network. That's the part of us that constantly is reviewing our lives and urging us to do more than merely survive.
For those of us who have faced trauma, the default mode network can become over protective, creating a very vicious cycle. keeping busy seems to numb the pain momentarily, like placing a blanket over the right hemisphere is amygdala, providing a temporary disconnect. However, beneath that blanket, the authentic self arrives in pain, totally unacknowledged.
And this internal struggle, it really intensifies over time. It resurfaces vigorously once the busyness subsides. Facing this...
50% Complete