With the way things have been going in our world, I’ve heard quite a few people talking about how long they have been alone. How long they have been in a sense of isolation and not having the liberty to engage with others as they used to be accustomed to.
Their life has really changed, and some people feel scared. They are noticing that the longer they are alone, the more sensitive they feel when they do get to venture out. They have a high-tuned alert sensing into other people, worrying about social distancing, worrying about who is wearing a mask and who isn’t wearing a mask.
They are worried about their own health and well-being, as well as the health and well-being of those they love. So, they might over-think things which creates a worrying cycle that creates more anxiety and stress, which creates more cortisol flooding their system. This is going to wear them out by creating a sense of exhaustion from the inside out. They have this hypervigilance for...
I’ve been thinking about what it’s like when one feels mistrustful. This can show up in different ways perhaps; maybe you’re feeling mistrustful of a situation and there are components of that situation that stand out to you. It just doesn't feel safe, or it feels out of balance.
Maybe the mistrust is in relationship with another person, there’s something that’s been said, or an action taken that doesn’t contribute to your needs for consideration or respect.
Mistrust can show up in a lot of different ways. Maybe it shows up because you feel that there is not enough of something so you feel mistrustful whether you’ll have enough for yourself and worried that someone else is going to take more.
Most likely, these scenarios that play out reflections for us of our own inner experiences we had when we were younger. Revealing for us some inner patterns that need acknowledgement of what our experiences were like. We need understanding...
Have you ever had self judgements? I know I have, and I think that’s pretty common for a human being to have.
There was a person I was working with the other day who noticed a pattern that they struggled with. The pattern was being quiet when they were in relationship with somebody instead of speaking up when they had something they would like to say. Or, maybe they didn’t agree with a friend.
What would happen inside of them is they would have a self judgement. Criticizing not just themselves but also the other person, but not speaking up when they were not in agreement.
They developed a belief that they held a really bad energy inside of them. There was a hopelessness that this energy that would be so critical would run them, and they would feel helpless and hopeless and they’d say, “I can’t help it!”
A big ball of energy would come up as anger, criticism, and then there would come shame that they would heap upon their own head....
There has been a lot of anxiety that goes around; with any transition, seasonally, a new year, starting a new job, or new neighbors. There are so many different ways that we can experience transitions in our life.
I was working with a client the other day and they were noticing how they’d get really busy leading up to any kind of an event. That it had actually become a way of life. They were noticing just how much getting anxious affected their body.
Not only did if affect their body, it also affected their thoughts, how they would speak to themselves and what they would tell themselves. They uncovered what they would do is tell themselves, “I will not relax. I will be responsible for getting everything done, even though I might suffer just a minute, I will keep on plowing through.”
Underneath that there were some shadow beliefs; I don’t have a choice. I don’t have support, there is a complete lack of support. So, acknowledging the need for...
Have you ever felt intense emotions? I have. It’s really important, if we haven’t had anyone to accompany us with intense emotions, to know that it’s possible to develop not just a tolerance for them, but to welcome them and recognize energetically what they are meaning for us.
To recognize what the gifts are that they are bringing to our awareness, rather than trying to push them away or smoosh them down. They will just get bigger when we do that.
I was working with someone who was feeling very intense emotions. They would have very intense anger, then it would flip into very intense sadness. Their experience was, when these intense emotions came, it always made life more difficult, everything would get worse, and they always felt they were made wrong.
There was no sense of welcoming of their intense emotions, so their intense emotions got even more intense. That can burn us out, it’s really hard on our nervous system, pumping all this cortisol and...
I was working with a client the other day and they said they were feeling just so bad. It was as if they were immobilized, frozen, from the inside out. What they noticed was that they stopped noticing what they felt in their body. It was as if they became numb and their head became really heavy as well.
As they started to experience a shift, what they began to notice was they could begin to sense their peripheral senses. When we can begin to notice the space between our first two fingers it can start to bring us back in a completely different way.
This is a very unique thing to be able to do, but, notice right now the space between your two first fingers. Is it warm, or is it cold? Is it moist, or is it dry? Simply notice without attempting to change anything, but just bringing your attention to your peripheral senses.
Another thing my client noticed was being able to have movement, to invite movement would begin to allow the energy to flow again...
The other day I was asked to write about what it would be like to be in a session with me for a summit coming up. The idea of participating in the summit delighted me, yet when I heard the request for me to write 100 words of less to draw people in, I drew a blank. It’s hard to describe what this is like.
What I did was reach out for some support to unpack that a little bit. When I went blank inside, it was like a big pause button had been pushed inside of me, and I recognized an opportunity for some deepening of my understanding of self.
As I was held in a sacred circle of support, I stepped back through time, which is a powerful process to welcome my inner experience more fully. What arose for me was my fourteen-year-old self. This part of me had made a vow never to write something that could be read publicly especially.
As I went back in time to be with this part and receive more clarity around it, what happened was my fourteen-year-old-self used to...
Sometimes I find myself falling back into really old patterns. Patterns that I thought I had let go and that I wasn’t ever going to use again. Sometimes what can happen, when I’ve noticed that I’m operating out of an old pattern, is I can just beat myself up with anger.
It sounds something like, “Oh, you are so stupid! I can’t believe you are doing that again!”
Then, inside I have this cringing with shame experience, “Oh my goodness, I can’t believe that! I’m so horrible.”
And the, I can fall even lower in the spectrum of energies. Into self-loathing, “Eeew, yuck.” Some disgust can come up.
Well, I’m really grateful that on my journey in this life, I’ve discovered that it’s possible to recognize these aspects of myself with compassion. In those moments I can acknowledge how it feels to be me. I can speak to myself, “Gloria, are you just feeling such...
Fear and anger can be really powerful forces. When I’ve worked with people, and taken time to do my own inner work, a discovery that I’ve made is any time that I’ve had an anger reaction, when I can slow it down I unpack it, I discover there was a fear right underneath it that started the cascade of emotional reaction within me. Depending on what our life experience has been, that can look really different for all of us.
I was working with someone the other day, and they noticed that this fear came up really quickly, and right on its heels there was an anger. Just a feisty anger and so much of it. Then, there would be a complete shut down right after that.
As we took time with this, and went into the process of Healing You, there was an image that came up of a small child within that had a sense of heaviness and wanted to cry. There was no comfort, no soothing available. As we rode the wave of this energy there was a memory of big people and lots...
What happens inside of us when we are self-critical? Where does that even begin? I’ve spent some time with this and for a couple of nights I would wake up around 2 or 3 and there would be this self-critical voice spinning around and around. The more it would spin, the more critical it would become.
What would happen for me was a contraction, a kind of collapse inside of myself. As I woke up a little more, to actually pay attention in a new way, I recognized that this voice had a flavor to it. It was, “How could you?” So, there was shame in there, and as I sat with that, I could hear underneath that “How could you?” that there was deep grief inside of myself.
This voice inside was listing all of the ways that I had failed as a mother. That’s really huge. My life’s dream when I was a little girl was to be a mother. So, it was rehashing all of those moments that I wanted...
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