Regret and Shame

Sep 04, 2020

Many of us started out on our path in life ill-equipped completely unaware of the problems in life we would encounter, let alone how to navigate them when they arose. We did the best we could with what we had and experienced it may very well have not been enough.

Now we might be stuck in the looping pattern of rehashing the past, recriminating ourselves with a barrage of what we SHOULD have done, but didn’t. So, we hang our heads in shame from the heaping mounds of evidence we hold against ourselves. Or, we feel resentment building in our hearts and get angry how unfair life has been becoming more and more cynical how impossible it is to have the power to have life be different.

We find ourselves living our life from the energies of anger, guilt, shame and depression, oscillating between these states feels impotent.

Personally, I started out my young adult life very ill-equipped. I was a very young wife and mother, at the age of 18. I remember my mom saying something about,...

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What Do You Want to Avoid?

Aug 28, 2020

This morning when I woke up, I recognized a familiar pattern, of wanting to roll back over and go to sleep. There is an ongoing list in my head of all the things I need to attend to. It felt like the list was growing and getting larger and more difficult. I noticed that familiar time-crunch. The time-crunch, when it happens, can feel painful. It’s as if there is not enough time to attend to everything I want to attend to.

As I’m noticing that, and taking the time to breath into that, and notice what happens in my body when I tell myself that. When I say that there’s not enough time to get everything done. There is a tightening that happens, a constriction.

Then, I thought about my herd, I haven’t even gotten to spend as much time with them as I would like to. So, I’m out here to spend time with my herd now. I love the way they support me and stand beside me; they have done that for years. Taking time to be, right where I am, with acceptance and grace.


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Losing Track of Time

Aug 21, 2020

Have you ever gotten so caught up in a project that time is just gone, and all you are is consumed, just focusing on this project? All of the different details, all of the new things you are learning, discovering how to apply them so that everything can all come together beautifully! And, then all of a sudden you realize that you are exhausted! Maybe you forgot to eat your lunch, you haven’t been drinking enough water, maybe you missed an appointment and you’re like, “What the heck is going on here!”

Well, that’s been this week in my life folks! I have been really focused on a project and I’m very excited about this project. I’m launching a free 5-part video series that invites people that resonate with The Healing You Method to explore and get a taste of it, and to explore what their next steps might be.

So there has been a lot of complexity and it has been a very fun journey because it has been stretching me to grow from the inside out. To...

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What stings you in your life?

Aug 14, 2020

At the tender age of 14, I experienced abuse. In my early adult life, I experienced memories being triggered, stinging, painful memories I had not been aware of before. As a result, I found myself swirling in such incredible shame I just wanted to stay in bed and hide.   


Fast forward several years and an amazing thing occurred. The horse of my youth came to me in a dream and reminded me that I wasn’t alone. 

I felt hopeful receiving this message, and trusted that just as the horses had nurtured me when I was young; horses were calling me to trust them again to receive the energy to move forward in my life. 

How do we begin to heal our inner wounds? How is it possible to begin to feel the pain of the past without falling into overwhelm? How do we hold onto hope? When our hurt was created interpersonally; our healing must be also. For that, we can receive the supportive gifts of presence and wisdom from other mammals – including...

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Unpacking Anger and Sadness

Aug 07, 2020

This morning when I woke up, I was in a bit of a downward spiral that began last night. The last couple of months have been pretty full for me. I’ve been passionate about creating lots of online resources for free so that people have access to them. I’ve been collaborating with colleagues, reaching out to have partnership with others to provide services, and establishing myself on lots of different platforms and learning TONS. There have been a lot of new learning edges for me.

At the same time, I’m doing my best to maintain my own life’s rhythm. With myself, my husband, my children, grandchildren, my friends, my herd, it’s quite a full life!

Getting to the point where I launched my course it felt wonderful! As I pause and assess where I’m at and where I’m going, I began the process of mapping that out in order to communicate clearly, effectively, and honestly with others that I’m in relationship with. I want to have mutual...

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What Happens When We Don’t Feel Safe?

Aug 03, 2020

In all new situations, our sensory organs immediately begin an observational process to determine whether it is safe, or if we need to get out QUICK!

Dr. Stephen Porges, a neuroscientist, has termed this process of perception and evaluation “neuroception.” He defines this process as “how neural circuits distinguish whether situations or people are safe, dangerous or life threatening”. This rapid response hardware and software integration takes place in the limbic system of our brain which works at a sub-conscious level.

One key element if we have experienced trauma, is the perception of threat can be real or has the "felt-sense" of being real to our body. Even when no threat exists in our environment.

When our nervous systems are designed to constantly seek safety from danger and threat, how do we manage to live harmoniously in a world full of new people and situations? How do we connect and establish relationships without freezing up or shutting down?


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Looks That Imply Wrongness

Jul 24, 2020

Have you ever had someone else give you a look that caused you to recoil with a shame reaction? Maybe the look implied that you’d done something wrong or that you hadn’t done something well enough. Maybe it brought up a fear inside of you around feeling hurt or rejected. Or it sparked a need to defend yourself and it was really uncomfortable. Yet, your voice just couldn’t be heard. 

Maybe when this happened, you felt invisible or they obviously didn’t even know you. At the same time, even if they are having expectations of you, I’m wondering if you are needing some shared reality around what it’s like to receive projections from others. I’m guessing you may be needing your own intentions to be acknowledged and seen for what they truly are. 

When someone gives us a look, especially if it is one of disgust, it’s going to cause that instantaneous response in our nervous system. Our neck and our shoulders will actually lose...

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What Inspires You?

Jul 17, 2020

What is it that wakes you up in the morning that you are excited about and looking forward to experiencing in your life?

The flip of that is what knocks you off balance? What shifts your focus and you find you are no longer on track or feeling that sense of inspiration or resourcefulness.

Maybe you find that an old pattern comes up and life is more like a drudgery. It’s like, “Oh no, it’s a Monday again.” Maybe you notice that your health begins to deteriorate, and you have a lowered immune system and you catch the sniffles or a cough. Then you start hearing this negative chatter that circles around and around in your head and you start noticing everything that is off. It’s no fun and you get grumpy about it all. Then you get low energy, lethargic and a lack of motivation, and then it’s oh my gosh, how did I get here? Am I here again?!

Well, that’s been a repeating chapter in my life that I’m thankfully beginning to recognize sooner,...

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Do You Feel All Alone Or That You Don't Matter?

Jul 10, 2020

Today I made a request of myself, that I make this video in order to turn something around from deep inside of my heart. 

It was a rainy, dismal day, and I noticed that every time it is a rainy, dismal day, it would affect my perception of life. I would feel really drained and blah, lethargic, depleted and listless. Then I would start noticing when things were out of order, messy, or cluttered. Next, I noticed how messy my closet was and I felt like there was just so much to do! 

Then, when I was working on making a recording, the processing was taking hours to complete. Everything was like this sticky, push-pull, really uncomfortable experience that I was not enjoying. 

The predominate feelings that I took the time to unpack were; lethargic, under-whelm, lonely, weary, detached, withdrawn, and gloomy. It was like the weather was being a metaphor, a reflection of my inner implicit sea, of me. 

The shadow beliefs that were running me was a very familiar one, where...

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Do You Worry?

Jul 03, 2020

Do you ever worry about anything? I do. I woke up this morning really worried about a lot of things that I didn’t realize that I was worrying about. I don’t know for you, but I know for me I can catch the “what if’s” What if this happens, or what if that happens, or what if this DOESN’T happen? What if that other thing happens? That is a tangled web that can get complicated and murky. 

Another thing that can happen with the worries for me is I can fear the worst. Learning all these new technologies that I’m doing, as I’m developing my sense of self in the world and wanting to reach more people and create more resources, what if I crash the whole program? That would be disastrous. What if my internet goes out when I’m in the middle of making a recording? Or what if my sound doesn’t work? What if the internet makes everything slow way down, and then speed up really fast? I’ve had that happen to me, and I...

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